I turn 36 today. It sort of broke my brain to realize that it’s been 18 years since I was 18 (I’m an age of majority past being the age of majority). It’s made me think about what I’ve managed to create or do with my life. My depression-brain immediately went to “you’ve made nothing,” but that’s the depression lying, because that’s what depression does. It’s my birthday. Let’s try and do better. What have I done with myself since I turned 18?
- I traveled across the country solo, for a several month walkabout. I liked doing it so much that I did again a few years later. I still love to travel and would love to take off for a few months again.
- I helped run an online game that’s still going, creating a dozen+ areas, managed a team of creators, and made a lot of friends along the way.
- I helped create and run a gaming convention, including doing work I wouldn’t have otherwise expected to do (chasing corporate sponsorships, etc). I learned a lot from the experience.
- I got married. I got divorced, too. Really, I’ve had several long term, fulfilling relationships that I still appreciate and don’t regret, even if they did end.
- I bought a house! And sold it. I’ve lived in Seattle (a childhood goal, dating back to being a 10 year old Nintendo fanboy), and Portland (a place I actually felt like I fit in for a while, more so than pretty much anywhere else I’ve lived).
- I went to college! And graduated! As much as a Bachelor’s degree isn’t valued as much as it used to be, I’m still glad to have it.
- I managed to work in games for a while (also a childhood dream), and helped with both game and product launches.
- I worked in the software industry, for a top-tier company, on products I actually liked and cared about.
I’m sure there’s lot of things to be proud of that I’m glossing over, but I didn’t really expect to make an exhaustive list. Just wanted to remind myself that I’ve actually had a pretty nice life, and have gotten to do some pretty interesting things. It leaves me curious about what the next 18 years has in store.
Yeah, that feeling like you should always be further along. It’s BS: you do plenty, it’s just societal pressure to follow a “standard” path.
Happy birthday Cuzzy!
Nice list on your blog. I’m concerned about the fact that I’m now 46 finishing my own bachelors and yes, agreed never seems like it’s enough
Thanks! 😃
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Dayna L. Himot
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